Measure of success

I have chosen kindness - toward myself and all others - as the measure of my success in life.

The mind

"Who is your enemy? Mind is your enemy. No one can hurt or harm you more than your own mind. Who is your friend? Mind is your friend. No one can benefit you, or bless you, or bring you more goodness than your well trained mind." The Buddha

What would I choose?

One of the highlights of my day is the drive from and to work. I drive from Mission Canyon to the Industrial district in Santa Barbara, on Alameda Padre Sierra (APS). The drive, infused with nature and sky, feels like coming up for fresh air. The drive isn't necessarily the shortest, but crosses town without stop lights. Yesterday I had to change the itinerary because of a meeting with a friend. I thought: "What if today were my last day alive, would I bypass my formidable evening drive?" I would not. I got on APS, drove a bit, and got off. I drove less, but had my taste of nectar anyhow. I cherished its curves, the view of the ocean partly hidden by the marine layer.

I've been asking myself this question lately: "What would I choose here if my intention was to come from love? Would I do this, say this, eat this, take this route, buy this thing, interrupt that person at work?" I am referring to fairly neutral situations, with no emotional charge, no sense of "right or wrong". It is interesting to notice the answer compared to the habitual course of action, at times significantly different, at times a mere nudge away.

100. The heartburn of love

What is
this desperate need
to feast
on long gone cigarettes of long,
on wine glasses,
on gulps of carbonated life,
on hard, wet organs,
on every distraction,
that I've cultivated
through time,
languages,
landscapes,
methods,
journeys,
pleads,
and tears?

What is
this latency of life
suspended
in the experience
of yearning,
lodged in an
ever present time,
licking my heart hard,
blowing on it,
mounting my chest
like a wild,
violent stallion?

Is this
the heartburn of love,
disheartened
with the illusion of resolution,
clamoring for the bell to go off
for time to cease,
and with it,
the pain
of human existence?

© Ciro Coelho. Pachamama Cabin, Santa Barbara, July 20, 2008, 1:31pm

Simplicity

I tend to be particularly fond of earth-shattering breakthroughs, but lately I have seen repeated examples of deceptively simple deepest truths. I have found them in books such as: "Comfortable with Uncertainty", by Pema Chodron and "Ruling Your World", by Sakyong Mipham. I realize that meditation and mindfulness practices - which develop awareness and openness - also have a hand on one's ability to perceive simple truths as jewels.

Big Flower, Small Flower, by Gil Fronsdal

This Dharma talk by Gil Fronsdal is a true peal. Recorded from a training at the Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Northern California, it can be downloaded for free from http://dharmaseed.org/teacher/74/ (Copy this URL to your browser). Once on that site, click the "download" button next to the talk.

Today's practice

Today's practice wasn't clear until the very end of the day when I realized that the challenges of the day had been met with a different quality: There was emotion, but no story line. Very little commentary attached.

On "Awake"

I sometimes read poems that I wrote a while back and I wonder, "Who wrote this?". The poem posted earlier today, "Awake" , from 2006, inspired me as a rare moment of clarity.

77. Awake

Every day,
For the last ten years,
I have looked at you
And seen me.
Every once in a while
I have awaken from my trance,
From my dull masking of your nature,
And seen the beauty
Of your tall, slim body
The elegance of you lines
The girlish hesitance of your jokes
The deepness of you calm voice,
And the raw woman yearning to be loved.
Those rare moments of lucidity,
Often followed by tears of humility,
Have reshaped the face of my planet.
I now stop and contemplate
The lesson, so sparsely understood
As I give myself away
To a sitting session
Illuminated by the light of you.

©2006 Ciro Coelho, June 14, 2006, 7:21am